In this blog post, I’ll explore why we continue to chase and wait for things even though we know we can’t get what we want in life.
I’ve had some reflections on my ordinary daily life. This summer break was a time when I was able to do a lot of thinking. Nothing special happened, but I felt a lot from those ordinary days. I’d like to write down some of the thoughts that come to mind.
During the break, my daily routine consisted of taking one summer session class and working part-time at a cram school. I also went to the beach during the vacation season. And while I was back home resting, I met up with a lot of friends. I also played soccer and basketball, just like I did in high school. I have a friend I’ve known since elementary school, and when I met up with him, we talked a lot about our lives. Whenever I talk with this friend, the song “That’s How It Was Back Then” always comes to mind. As we reminisce about the past, we often say things like, “Yeah, that’s right, that’s really how it was back then…,” “That’s how it was back then…” We’d say things like that back and forth. The lyrics of this song, which start with “We were so young, we didn’t know anything…,” make me feel like it’s perfect to sing right now.
When I think back on those days, I realize it was good to be so young and unaware of so much. That’s because, no matter what I did, I’d just go ahead and do it—rather than worrying about it or thinking about whether it would be helpful to me or not. Nowadays, before doing anything, I worry about what will happen if I do it, and I weigh how important it is to me. Often, I end up just thinking about it and never taking action. But before doing something, there’s no way to know what I’ll gain from it. So, sometimes I’ve just gone ahead and done things on a whim.
People often say it’s wise to hesitate or make a plan before starting something. When I was younger, I also had many experiences where I rushed headlong into things and failed, so now I tend to be cautious. But caution hasn’t always led to good results. In fact, there were times when, caught up in my plans, I missed opportunities to make choices, and my determination to achieve something faded. That’s why sometimes, thinking simply and acting on impulse can lead to good results. Ultimately, what matters in life is that when I try something—whether the outcome is as expected or not—it propels me forward.
Sometimes, just like the lyrics of a song that go, “The world really isn’t easy…,” everything in life feels overwhelming. At times like that, I usually meet up with friends, have a drink, forget my troubles, and start the next day anew. One day, feeling inexplicably restless, I reached out to a friend. As usual, we had a drink and chatted about this and that. We laughed as we reminisced about the past and worried about what lay ahead. As we were just talking about all sorts of things, I started wondering if there was anything we could do to escape our daily routine. That’s when I remembered a spontaneous trip I’d taken with friends before. We hadn’t decided where to go or what to do there; we’d just agreed to meet at Tokyo Station. Once we got together, we bought the fastest train tickets without a second thought and headed to Osaka. We ended up going to Osaka and back, and it had its own unique excitement and fun. Thinking back on that time, I realized that whenever I wanted to get away, I never agonized over whether to go or not, or where to go. So this time, I decided that if a place came to mind, just like back then, I wouldn’t overthink it—I’d just head there.
As we were brainstorming ideas, a friend suggested we go fishing. I’m not sure why, but it just felt like a good idea. Honestly, I was a little hesitant, but I decided to go along with it as we’d originally planned. After hearing my friend say he’d contact me the next morning, I went home and fell asleep. When I woke up the next day and the hangover had worn off, I thought yesterday’s conversation had just been drunken talk. It felt like I’d been reeled in like a fish, rather than actually going fishing. So I’d given up hope, but luckily, my friend got in touch. And that’s how we ended up going fishing.
It was a typical summer day—the sun was blazing, but a breeze was blowing, making it quite pleasant. As we drove out of the city, the heaviness in my heart seemed to lift somewhat. After driving for about an hour, we arrived at a reservoir on the outskirts of Tokyo around lunchtime. We visited an elderly man who ran a fishing spot my friend knew, and he gave us directions. We were going to fish from a floating platform on the reservoir. We loaded our fishing rods and other gear onto a small boat and rowed out to the platform. We unpacked our gear and got ready to fish. Just as we were finishing our preparations, the elderly gentleman from earlier brought us lunch. We ate first and then started fishing. We had to bait the hook with earthworms and cast the line into the right spot, but since it was our first time, it didn’t go smoothly at first. With my friend’s help and after a few attempts, I was finally able to cast the line reasonably well. Anyway, after casting the worms, we sat down and waited for the fish to bite. Maybe because it was my first time, I got a bit too eager. I wanted to catch a fish right away. We sat there like that for an hour or two, but just sitting around got boring, and I even started to think I’d come for nothing. Still, my friend told me that waiting that long was no big deal, so I decided to clear my mind and just wait. As I sat there with the intention of waiting patiently, the scenery around me caught my eye. It wasn’t a spectacular view, but gazing out at the open space without a care in the world made me feel at ease.
I was chatting with my friend while waiting when suddenly my fishing rod began to shake. Before I knew it, I yanked the rod toward me and saw a fish had taken the earthworm. It was a small fish called a “nuchi,” but to me, it wasn’t just any small fish. It was the first fish I’d ever caught in my life.
That night, before falling asleep, I found myself lost in thought. The feeling I had when I reeled the fish in with my rod was an emotion I’d never experienced before, yet for some reason, it didn’t feel like the first time. As I reflected on that feeling, it occurred to me to compare the act of gaining something in life to catching a fish while fishing. When you’re fishing, just because you sit there with your rod out, hoping to catch a fish, doesn’t mean you’ll necessarily reel one in. Similarly, in life, just because I want something and strive to get it doesn’t mean I’ll necessarily achieve it. Things don’t always go the way we want them to. Of course, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to achieve anything. Whether what we’re striving for is good grades, recognition or affection from others, or money, it’s worth taking a moment to reflect before we go after it. We need to remember that sometimes we can’t get what we want. We can’t always have everything we desire. And we need to understand that achieving something requires not only effort but also patience.
Ever since that day when I compared life to fishing, I’ve decided to slow down a little. I realized that constantly chasing results and living at a breakneck pace was wearing me out. From now on, I’ve resolved to approach everything with a sense of ease and to enjoy the small achievements along the way. Just as the long wait to catch a fish isn’t in vain, I’ve decided never to forget that life’s little moments are precious too.
